This morning, I woke with a headache, and it wasn’t a hangover!
I’d been worrying about something… yes, therapists cogitate on things too!
I realised within a few moments of stirring that I’d been clenching my jaw. Happily, it’s not something I experience often, but I have had episodes of jaw clenching in the past. For a while last summer (when I was totally stressed-out over my builder’s behaviour, and to be frank, the quality of his work) I was grinding my teeth, not just clenching my jaw.
Often the first to identify what is typically a night-time activity is the dentist and my dentist certainly noticed the damage I’d done to my teeth by my nocturnal gnashing.
It’s hard to stop an activity that occurs most frequently during sleep, and so is out of one’s conscious control.
What these two occasions had in common was not just that I was stressed, but that I needed to address or deal with something.
I was constantly turning over in my mind what I could or should say or do.
In my experience as a therapist, I’ve observed that bruxism is often experienced by individuals who aren’t speaking up about something when they would benefit from doing so.
Usually, clients who want help for bruxism are unaware that the thing they are ignoring or putting up with may be the cause or trigger for the painful bruxing. I mean, it all sounds a bit woo-woo, right?
My travels around St Helier (the hospital, not the delightful capital of Jersey)
There was a time years ago when my throat felt tight and talking felt strained. As a therapist and hypnotherapy trainer the ability to talk comfortably and project was pretty important.
My GP at the time thought I had an infection and prescribed antibiotics; they didn’t work. My vocal struggles continued and my GP initiated a 2-week referral.
Over the next few weeks and months, I was seen and scanned by numerous specialists, but no test yielded a diagnosis. It was a scary time.
Finally, I was sent to Voice Therapy where I was seen by a lovely woman who, by chance, was an NLP practitioner.
After a chat, she quickly diagnosed gastric reflux and spasmed vocal cords caused by emotional factors. Her words were, ‘I think you’re upset by your friend moving away’. And she was right.
One of my two best friends was leaving the area, and I knew I wouldn’t see her often. It made me sad and upset, but I’d not vocalised it. I hadn’t told her how I felt, nor did I share my distress with anyone else, I just accepted it, and ‘kept it zipped’.
Many of us are taught to remain composed, to suppress, or swallow our feelings.
We put a brave face on it and ‘push on through’ and tell everyone we’re fine.
In my experience (personal, and professional) there’s always a price to pay for pushing stuff down or ignoring it. I became fascinated by psychosomatic conditions, especially those that affected the voice.
Many of my clients with such conditions (e.g. Bruxism and Globus Pharyngeus) have found a reduction in their uncomfortable symptoms through talking therapy and hypnosis.
They also benefitted greatly from learning how to become more assertive. For those who have been taught to keep schtum, the word ‘assertive’ is interpreted as aggressive or confrontational, but assertiveness is simply clear, confident, communication.
When clients get comfortable with communicating assertively, they feel much better and enjoy a new level of calmness and sense of control.
I can’t promise that you’ll stop clenching your jaw or grinding your teeth by working with me, but many people do.
If you want to find out more about hypnotherapy for bruxism or therapy to improve assertiveness, please book a call with me, I’d love to hear from you.
I offer online and face-to-face therapy sessions, and 3-day Intensive Therapy Retreats in Hebden Bridge, West Yorkshire.
